Cellphoned

I collected my bags and joined the crowd that pushed its way through the exit, a narrow, sinuous valley of speed-walking laptopped and cellphoned executives.

“Why do I shop for produce here?” I asked myself, as I do every time I find myself fighting for cart space with cellphoned students.

With their rowdy 24/7 lagered clientele, undraped beer-bellies lobstering in the sun, gobbing at the stationary traffic four feet from the table they are waiting to throw at the Man U chara-convoy which cellphoned pickets have told them is just coming off the M1?

Outside, the suited and cellphoned elite and the insufferably gorgeous businesswomen in tight tube skirts and stiletto heels drifted by in a rushed cloud.

Now cellphoned tourists, constantly alerted, chase relaxation in the Baltic sun.