Crotchbulge

He commenced to do a little dance, jarring himself down hard on his bare heels while the crotchbulge of his bikini jiggled alarmingly, without ever taking his anxious eyes off the other man standing in front of him.

Tall and muscular, he wore a very tight, very brief swimsuit. Her eyes went to the crotchbulge.

It's the last dying vestige of hope that there has been some kind of colossal mistake and Captain Crotchbulge is in fact here to meet some other poor unfortunate girl called Laura, who’s just running a bit late.