Glampire

Well, it's basically a supernatural Dawson's Creek—a humiliatingly addictive soap opera in the meadows, with glampire Edward (Pattinson) as Dawson and Native American beefcake Jacob (Taylor Lautner) as Pacey.

“Because they couldn't even tell a real vampire from a glampire. Lucy didn't know anything.”

[…] Anyway, you have to go to Annandale today. It's your cure day surprise. You get to kill a glampire." "Christ. One of those vampire poseurs?" "Oh yes. With the white face paint and dopey satanic rituals and everything. […]