Lactifluous

Me. But how does that appear? Og. Oh, the nun at Constantinople that gave it said so. Me. It may be she had it of St. Bernard. Og. I believe she had. Me. He, when he was very old, had the happiness to taste milk from the same nipple which the child Jesus sucked, whence I wonder he was not rather called Lactifluous than Mellifluous.

But the pronouncing aright of California names is only a part of the duty. There needs to be a present crusade for the preservation of our historical names from oblivion.¶ It is not so much the lactifluous tenderfoot who is our danger in this case, but the wax-witted Philistines of the Post Office Department and the railroads; two Boeotian despots that have a great deal to do with place names and who have committed some of the most cold-blooded murders known to etymology.

On March 1 a bleary-eyed, drop-horned and also knock-kneed 9-year-old Friesian cow named Bridge Birch (above) of Moortown Farm, Hampshire, England, concluded a lactifluous year by producing her 45,081st pound of milk.

The bare teats of the human females bored out from this two-dimensional undergrowth like the barrels of lactifluous guns.