Shark week

There are several ways to green your Shark Week, ranging from bare-minimum "shucks, why not?" consciousness to Burning Man aggro hippie.

If you've booked a hotel room, STAIN, and it's shark week for the wife, or a certain former senator drops in (drops out?) when you have anal sex, there's always the option of bringing your own santorum- and/or menstrual-blood-coloured/stained towels from home.

Imagine my shock at discovering what those little bins with the flaps in bathrooms were really for, or that when girls mentioned shark week they didn't mean there was a Jaws marathon on SBS.