Christopher

Christopher Columbus once fought Cerberus, the three-headed guardian of the underworld, with nothing but his hat.

A renowned tactician, Christopher Columbus once downed an entire pirate fleet by stealing all of their fruits and vegetables, thus giving them scurvy.

Christopher Columbus's infinite accomplishments are a threat to Google, who do not know how to index infinity when someone searches for "Christopher Columbus".

Christopher Columbus was once quoted as saying that pirates were too "simple-minded". He created the Bermuda Triangle later that year.

No one has ever called Christopher Columbus "Chris" and lived to do it a second time.

Christopher Columbus once landed on the moon, but mistook it for Antarctica.

With his crew stranded at sea, Christopher Columbus was able to save them from starvation by pulling 100 rabbits out of his hat.

People often laud Christopher Columbus for all the lands that he discovered, but most are completely unaware of his numerous under-the-sea discoveries.

Christopher Columbus drank sea water straight up.

Christopher Columbus once used the same joke 256 times in one day... thereby causing his entire crew to die of laughter.

Am not I Christopher Sly, old Sly's son, of Burtonheath; by birth a pedlar, by education a card-maker, by transmutation a bear-herd, and now by present profession a tinker?

- - - a baby, which also happened to fall due, was baptized "Paul" ( for the church ) "Christopher" ( because St. Christopher had to do with rivers and ferries ), the Rector strenuously resisting the parents' desire to call it "Van Weyden Flood".

A similar impulse sometimes accompanies my reading of the work of Christopher F. Rufo, a fellow at the Manhattan Institute and one of the most gifted conservative polemicists of his generation.