Stilton

"Knock knock, is anyone home?" "Go away!" "I can't hear you." "Okay, what is it?" "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Geronimo Stilton." "What do you want?" "Your Highness, allow me to cross your kingdom so that I can get—" "Denied." "But—" "Unless you're a true warrior." "Believe me when I tell you that I am NOT a knight." "So you have no sword?" "Not even one. I am not a knight." "How about a piece of the Triforce?" "I am NOT a knight!" "You look like a knight on this picture I found on your website." "I am not a knight!" "Then go away." "But... okay."

That's the Stilton!